Letter 384: Before I had cleanly recovered from the affliction in my head, a greater evil seized me — one that filled my soul...

To Strategius. (358/59) Before I had yet been cleanly freed from the malady in my head, another, greater malady seized me, which filled my soul with darkness and on account of which many of my friends sat beside me for a long time, trying with every incantation to keep my wits safe. For what do you think became of me when I learned that the dearest city had fallen along with the dearest of men? I neglected food, I cast away words, I drove off sleep, and I lay in silence for the longest while, and there were tears from us both over those men, and from my intimates over me, until at last someone urged me to lament in words both the city and the man who did not deserve such an end, O Zeus. Persuaded by him, and having cast out some portion of my suffering upon the written page, I now mourn with a sound mind. If, then, I did not also suppose your judgment to be disturbed, bereft as you are of a friend who showed by his deeds the truth of his name, I would beg that consolation come to me from you; but since the blow is shared, it remains for me to groan, which indeed is what I do.

Στρατηγίῳ. (358/59) Οὔπω με καθαρῶς ἀπαλλαγέντα τοῦ ἐν τῇ κεφαλῇ κα- κοῦ μεῖζον ἕτερον ἔλαβε κακόν, ὃ τὴν ψυχὴν ἐνέπλησε ζόφου καὶ δι’ ὃ πολλοὶ τῶν φίλων πολύν μοι παρεκάθηντο χρόνον πάσαις ἐπῳδαῖς πειρώμενοι διασῶσαί μου τὰς φρένας. τίνα γὰρ οἴει με γενέσθαι πυθόμενον ὡς ἡ φιλτάτη πόλις ἐπὶ τοῖς φιλτάτοις πέπτωκεν ἀνδράσιν; ἠμέλησα μὲν σιτίων, ἔρριψα δὲ λόγους, ἀπεωσάμην δὲ ὕπνον, σιγῇ δὲ ἐπὶ πλεῖστον ἐκείμην, δάκρυα δὲ ἡμῶν ἅμα μὲν ἐπ’ ἐκείνοις, τῶν δὲ ἐπιτηδείων ἐπ ἐμοί, πρὶν δή τις παρῄνεσεν ἐν λόγοις θρηνῆσαι τήν τε πόλιν καὶ τὸν οὐ τοιαύτης ἄξιον, ὦ Ζεῦ, τελευτῆς. ᾧ πεισθεὶς καὶ τοῦ πάθους τι μέρος ἐπὶ τῆς γραφῆς ἐκβαλὼν ἤδη πενθῶ σωφρονῶν. εἰ μὲν οὗν μὴ καὶ σοὶ τεταράχθαι τὴν γνώμην ἡγούμην ἐστερημένῳ φίλου δείξαντος ἔργοις τοὔνομα, ἐδεό- μην ἄν μοι παρὰ σοῦ φοιτᾶν παραμυθίαν· ἐπεὶ δὲ ἡ πληγὴ κοινή, λείπεταί μοι στένειν, ὃ δὴ καὶ ποιῶ.