Marcus Tullius Cicero→Titus Pomponius Atticus|c. 46 BC|Cicero|From Rome|To Rome/Athens|AI-assisted
You do not yet seem to grasp how little Antony disturbs me, nor how little anything of that kind could disturb me now. As for Terentia, I wrote to you about her in the letter I sent yesterday. You urge me, and you write that others too wish it, to disguise the fact that I am grieving so deeply; but can I do this any more than I do when I spend whole days on my books? And although I do this not for the sake of concealment but rather to soothe and heal my mind, still, even if I accomplish less for myself, I am at least doing enough to keep up the appearance.
[2] I have written you less, because I was awaiting your reply to the letter I sent yesterday. I was waiting above all to hear about the shrine [fanum, the memorial Cicero planned to dedicate to his late daughter Tullia], and also somewhat about Terentia. I should be glad if you would inform me in your next letter whether Gnaeus Caepio, the father of Servilia the wife of Claudius, perished in a shipwreck while his own father was still living or after he had died; likewise, whether Rutilia died while her son Gaius Cotta was still alive or after his death. These bear on the book I have written on the lessening of grief [the lost Consolatio, written after Tullia's death].
About Terentia, I do not recognise your usual consideration for me in throwing the whole weight of the matter on me. For those are the very wounds I cannot touch without deep groans. So please spare me, if you can. For I am not asking you more than you can do. You and you only can see what is fair. About Rutilia, as you seem to have doubts, write and let me know as soon as you know, but let that be as soon as possible: and also whether Clodia survived her son D. Brutus the ex-consul. The latter you can find out from Marcellus, or at any
rate from Postumia, the former from M. Cotta or Syrus or Satyrus.
About the gardens I earnestly entreat your aid. I must employ all my own resources and those of friends, who I know will not desert me: but I can manage with my own. There are things I could sell easily too. But without selling anything, if I pay interest to the person from whom I buy for no more than a year, I can get what I want, if you assist me. The most available are those of Drusus, as he wants to sell. The next I think are Lamia's; but he is away. However scent out anything you can. Silius again never uses his at all, and he will very easily be satisfied with the interest. Regard it as your own business, and don't consider what suits my purse, for that I don't care, but what suits me.
nondum videris perspicere quam me nec Antonius commovent nec quicquam iam eius modi possit commovere. de Terentia autem scripsi ad te eis litteris quas dederam pridie. quod me hortaris idque a ceteris desiderari scribis ut dissimulem me tam graviter dolere, possumne magis quam quom totos dies consumo in litteris? quod etsi non dissimulationis sed potius leniendi et sanandi animi causa facio, tamen si mihi minus proficio simulationi certe facio satis. [2] minus multa ad te scripsi, quod exspectabam tuas litteras ad eas quas pridie dederam. exspectabam autem maxime de fano, non nihil etiam de Terentia. velim me facias certiorem proximis litteris Cn. Caepio Serviliae Claudi pater vivone patre suo naufragio perierit an mortuo, item Rutilia vivone C. Cotta filio suo mortua sit an mortuo. pertinent ad eum librum quem de luctu minuendo scripsimus.
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You do not yet seem to grasp how little Antony disturbs me, nor how little anything of that kind could disturb me now. As for Terentia, I wrote to you about her in the letter I sent yesterday. You urge me, and you write that others too wish it, to disguise the fact that I am grieving so deeply; but can I do this any more than I do when I spend whole days on my books? And although I do this not for the sake of concealment but rather to soothe and heal my mind, still, even if I accomplish less for myself, I am at least doing enough to keep up the appearance.
[2] I have written you less, because I was awaiting your reply to the letter I sent yesterday. I was waiting above all to hear about the shrine [fanum, the memorial Cicero planned to dedicate to his late daughter Tullia], and also somewhat about Terentia. I should be glad if you would inform me in your next letter whether Gnaeus Caepio, the father of Servilia the wife of Claudius, perished in a shipwreck while his own father was still living or after he had died; likewise, whether Rutilia died while her son Gaius Cotta was still alive or after his death. These bear on the book I have written on the lessening of grief [the lost Consolatio, written after Tullia's death].
AI-assisted translation - This translation was produced with AI assistance and has not been peer-reviewed. See the 19th-century translation or original Latin/Greek below for scholarly use.
Latin / Greek Original
nondum videris perspicere quam me nec Antonius commovent nec quicquam iam eius modi possit commovere. de Terentia autem scripsi ad te eis litteris quas dederam pridie. quod me hortaris idque a ceteris desiderari scribis ut dissimulem me tam graviter dolere, possumne magis quam quom totos dies consumo in litteris? quod etsi non dissimulationis sed potius leniendi et sanandi animi causa facio, tamen si mihi minus proficio simulationi certe facio satis. [2] minus multa ad te scripsi, quod exspectabam tuas litteras ad eas quas pridie dederam. exspectabam autem maxime de fano, non nihil etiam de Terentia. velim me facias certiorem proximis litteris Cn. Caepio Serviliae Claudi pater vivone patre suo naufragio perierit an mortuo, item Rutilia vivone C. Cotta filio suo mortua sit an mortuo. pertinent ad eum librum quem de luctu minuendo scripsimus.